Catholic Sinners

This was an interesting day . . . at once, I am a beloved daughter of the most high God, and I am a horrible sinner! How do I reconcile the two? I am a slave of Christ (Mancipia Christi), a mere creature, an unprofitable servant . . . dust . . . nothing. If I saw myself as God sees me, then I would die out of fright! God mercifully doesn't show me this scary image. Nevertheless, I must ask God to let me see myself in a more truthful light -- always in union with Mary -- to obtain from God this great grace.

How grateful am I to God for all He has given me? Does the ugly head of pride enter the picture as I give credit to myself for my accomplishments, possessions, acts of charity, etc.? Don't I realize that pride spoils any works I have done . . . it contaminates them? Oh Lord, help me to be humble!

It struck me to read how as Catholics, our sins take on a greater culpability. When we sin, we are like Satan, who refused to serve God: Non serviam (I will not serve). There is no greater evil than sin. In the Catholic Church resides the fullness of the means of salvation. That doesn't mean that non-Catholics can't go to heaven. It simply means that our spiritual toolbox is fuller than theirs . . . we have more tools at our disposal. Granted . . . many Catholics don't know what those tools are . . . or how to use them. But once we are aware of what we have as Catholics, what the Church teaches, how we are to live our lives in cooperation with God's grace . . . then we take on a greater sense of responsibility, both for ourselves and others. To whom much is given, much is expected. At this stage, no longer can we claim ignorance . . . "Oh, I didn't know that was wrong or sinful."

So . . . Catholic sinners are worse than pagan sinners. Yes, if I fully avail myself of the treasures, blessings, graces, sacraments, etc. of the Catholic Church, then I should be able to more easily resist sin and temptation. I like St. Thomas' explanation. I love the Scriptural quotes. In the story of the vigilant and faithful servants, "the servant who knew his master's will, but did not make preparations nor act in accord with his will, shall be beaten severely." (Luke 12:47) This story presents an accurate depiction of mortal sin. When you meet the 3 conditions of a mortal sin: full knowledge, full consent, and grave matter, you've committed a "deadly" sin, you've cut yourself off from God and His grace . . . and the punishment will be more severe. On the other hand, "the servant who was ignorant of his master's will, but acted in a way deserving of a severe beating, shall be beaten only lightly." (Luke 12:48) This is like venial sin. Full knowledge is missing. The punishment is less severe. You are not completely cut off from God or the Body of Christ.

"Much will be required of the person entrusted with much, and still more will be demanded of the person entrusted with more." (Luke 12:48)

And Wisdom 6:7: "The mighty shall be mightily tormented." Ouch! Or as the NAB renders it: "For those in power, a rigorous scrutiny impends."

And as St. Thomas states, "Sin becomes much more scandalous when the sinner is honored for his position." If I am known as a practicing Catholic, committed to my Faith, and then I publicly sin -- what kind of example am I setting? Am I causing scandal? Are observers saying . . . "If Kim does it, it must be okay"? Am I now responsible for the actions and perhaps even the eternal destiny of others?

I must shamefully place myself at the feet of the Blessed Mother, the Refuge of sinners. A mother can put up with the most gruesome sights and situations when the good of the child is at stake. I remember when I was little, it was almost always my Mom who cleaned up the mess when I was sick and threw up!

Mary will receive me, like a prodigal daughter, the moment I realize what I have done by my sins. She will console me with the thought of the new spiritual birth, for which I am now preparing. She will tell me that, as the Mother of Mercy, she has a special role to play in the conversion of sinners and in bringing about their reconciliation with God. I need Mary like I need mercy. For she is the Mother of Mercy. "Refuge of sinners, pray for us!"